Ella, Bella, Umbrella
by ziddiz
Summary: At La Push beach Edward and the Gang meet someone that changes their life forever. They might start hating Jacob and La push, but they really like Jacob's girlfriend.


"There's absolutely no way in hell, those _gigantic, humongous, giants _are not using steroids!"

Alice sighed at the boys. The same subject every time they were in La Push, or La Push was mentioned, or anything about muscles, and the boys would start arguing about whether or not the _La Push __**teenagers**_ were using steroids or if somehow they all naturally got buffer and taller than Emmett in the span of two to three weeks. Mmm… that actually sounded odd; it took Emmett three years to where he wasn't gangly and awkward with his body.

"They could be doing yoga to help with their other fitness needs."

"Shut up, Jasper." Edward and Emmett liked to argue and Jasper always wanted some sort of peace treaty before they could even start.

Alice looked over to Rosalie for help but, that was probably the same thing as talking to the boys. Rosalie was completely female, one hundred percent. Except it was only on the outside. Other than her looks and tastes in the opposite sex, Rosalie was completely a big sexy man on the inside. Right now she seemed to be agreeing with Emmett and Edward, a finger to her lips while looking at the sky, a contemplative look on her face.

Alice groaned and wished they'd shut up.

Silence.

Alice looked around, only to see a sea of offended faces. Rosalie had her arms crossed and faced the wall next to her, which was so close every breath she took had her nose brushing against it; Emmett was looking down at the floor, shoulders slumped and brows furrowed; Edward was staring at her with shock and hands on his hips, _the drama queen that he was_; Jasper was pouting and tapping his right foot, _the Southern drama queen that __**he **__was._

"Oops, did I say that out loud?" Alice smiled sheepishly and shrugged her shoulders."Sorry."

"Alice," Jasper sighed disparagingly," acting like Penelope won't get you anywhere in life."

Rosalie piped in," Except you might meet Neil Patrick Harris."

Alice huh'd and nodded her head.

Before they could continue their previous conversation, Rosalie whispered quickly,"Look!"

And they looked. They looked to see at least ten six foot seven men, with darkly tanned and russet skin and bulging muscles. Their muscles were so big they seemed to flex involuntarily every time the boys moved. The only reason Alice called them boys was because she knew, except for one, the rest of the them were under the age of sixteen. But for some reason they looked like they were twenty five.

Emmett started to whine again,"Why is this happening to them and not me?!" He couldn't have been any more louder if he'd shouted it.

Jasper, of course, had to join his buddy."If Forks and La Push had any football, basketball, baseball, or any other sports team, they'd beat us so badly we'd look worse than Spain did. How did this even happen?"

Edward narrowed his eyes and straightened his back." I know why and how this was possible. Glee! F*** you, Glee!" Jasper and Emmett started nodding their head like it was the right answer.

Alice groaned and dropped her head in her hands, hoping Rosalie would stop this.

But Alice only heard her say,"Shit!" They all followed her shocked and… almost envious? gaze.

Standing next to Jacob, the tallest of the bunch, was the palest person they had ever seen. Since they lived in Forks, it was actually a surprise. But the reason for Rose's envy could only be understood from looking at her beauty. A head full of dark brown hair that would make any girl jealous. Legs that seemed to go on for miles, and breast that looked slightly intimidating to the girls and mouthwatering to the boys. They saw Jacob let out a full-on belly laugh, when she greeted him by jumping up to his height and giving him a hug. Jacob hugged her back for a two whole minutes and finally let her get on her own feet. He left his hand on her hip, while waving his hand around and telling her something. Whatever it was seemed to make her laugh loud and hard enough to hold onto her stomach.

Then three things happened at once. Emmett whispered:"F$$$ me!?", Jasper made a weird sound that combined a frogs croak and a crow's caw, Edward started making clawing motions with his hands and started purring.

Rosalie smacked both Emmett and Jasper on the head and Alice screamed. And then she quickly shut herself up because she'd gotten the whole beach's attention. Jacob looked towards the scream and after realizing who they were, he waved them over.


End file.
